A supportive consultant who provides critical insight – with a fun, and friendly style
Insurance against huge mistakes. Don’t send a script out before it’s ready. It costs you that valued first impression, and destroys a chance to connect. If you’re serious about your dreams, look no further.
The most common screenwriting mistake is sending out your script before it’s ready. Knowing this, David designed this service to get you one step closer to having a professionally written, compelling script. David’s analysis provides you with a 7-10 page critique on all aspects of your screenplay, including story/plot, characters, structure, dialogue, tone & commerciality. In addition to his comprehensive notes, you’ll also be given specific suggestions for improvements & answers to what David calls “The ScriptCoach Seven.” Additionally, you’ll be provided with a ScriptCoach Scorecard, which evaluates your script from top to bottom. Once you’ve purchased this service, please email your script to [email protected].
To get Hollywood Pros to read your script, you must first have a great pitch letter. Strong pitch letters are a vital first step towards getting your foot in the door. The truth is, it doesn’t matter how good your screenplay is if no one reads it. As a veteran producer, David has proven experience creating professional pitch letters that are compelling & persuasive. Bottom line: This is a terrific opportunity to have your script broken down clearly & concisely so that industry professionals will request it. Once you’ve purchased this service, please email your script to [email protected].
This service includes David’s notes and a one-hour phone consultation. Besides reviewing David’s analysis of your script, these consults can include career guidance, pitch tips & networking strategies. Once you’ve purchased this service, please email your script to [email protected].
Thanks for your help with the query editing. The script ‘The Departure’ is now in active development with a boutique production company. Very exciting stuff!
Thanks so much for the fast turnaround, David! Appreciate you and your VPF site!
Hello David, I would like to thank you once more for your help on my screenplay, ‘Chronicles of Atlantis.’ I have followed your advice, completed a second draft, and have thrown out a pitch via Virtual Pitch Fest. I promise, if I am ever successful with this project, I will never forget your part in it. There is a reason James from Netflix was interested, and although I do not know the gentleman, I owe it to him to bring this story to light. I was at the point of giving up when I saw his response of ‘YES’! Thank you. May all your endeavors be a success, and to quote Captain Kirk ‘May fortune favor the foolish.’
Abdur “Zack” Mohammed
Great markup! I found all of your points very insightful – incredibly helpful!
Again, thank you so much for your input and guidance. In addition to your insightfulness, I greatly appreciate your positive approach to all of this, in terms of how best to improve things – lots of great recommendations/solutions.
Thank you for the notes and the kind words! I waited till I got home to get on the computer to type this, but I just wanted to say: I appreciate the care you put into your notes – most readers probably just skim and do a quick write-up with boiler plate language – you have a lot of integrity in what you do. You’ve quickly become my go to person for notes.
Thanks so much for doing such a thorough and excellent job! Your comments made a lot of sense to me. Since I hadn’t done this before, I’m so thankful for your analysis which told me exactly where I need to focus. I’ll be taking your advice on reading/watching films and writing my six stage outline…then I’ll tackle the next draft. Thank you again. You have been a tremendous help!
Thanks for working so hard on this – you did a great job. These are fantastic notes. I think you zeroed in on the parts of the script I was never comfortable with, but couldn’t quite put my finger on. I found your suggestions to be very helpful and inspiring.
Thanks for your encouraging words…after our conversation I was able to let the characters verbalize their intentions without feeling like their words were contrived. I do know it opened a door and it was a lot of fun and very satisfying to write. I’m very grateful for your gift and willingness to share it with me.
Thank you for your thorough and thoughtful analysis of ‘Lies & Spies.’
I would like to tell you that after months of writing and contemplating your remarks concerning my ‘Dark West’ script, I’ve realized you were right in everything. Initially I was thinking, ‘what a pity, my script was not well understood,’ but I know I was wrong now. So, I am trying hard to integrate the logic of your remarks and the structure of your analysis into the way I think and write because this gradually makes me a better writer. Thank you very much for your help!
Just thought I’d let you know that I couldn’t leave this project alone and last year pitched it as a novel. So, to my surprise, it was snapped up immediately. Boy was that a thrill (still is) – but the transfer from screenplay to prose definitely took some big iterations…Still, it’s all done now, and the book will be released in August/September…Most importantly of all – THANK YOU! You were a great help in the story’s development. It’s now set back in Brisbane, and many story beats have changed, but you helped develop the characters, plot and theme, and I’ll be forever grateful.
Dr. Veny Armanno
Thank you so much for your amazing professional assistance with writing the “Designated Sitter’ query letter. I think it sounds fabulous! I am thrilled that I can now start sending it out today! Thank you again for offering this unique service!’
Thank you very much David for your notes, they are very helpful for me to improve this script on. I will certainly be sending you my revised version once it has been completed for another analysis.
Thanks for your very thorough and thoughtful analysis. You made a lot of good points and clearly know what you’re talking about. Everything you said makes sense.
David, thanks for the comments. These are exceedingly helpful.
Thank you, David, for the quick turnaround on my screenplay critique. This is exactly what I have been looking for, and am taking your advice to heart. I believe I can incorporate many of the elements you suggested with the next revision.
Thanks very much for your notes and letter! I was very pleased with your take on the relative strengths and weaknesses of my script. I will be working on a rewrite strategy based on your feedback, and will definitely be sending the next draft your way. Thanks again!
I know you hear this a lot, but you are truly brilliant. It is such a pleasure to have your insights…
I very much have appreciated your feedback and have been working on the script to improve. It’s coming along very well.
Wow! Thanks for your amazing and constructive feedback on my script ‘The Miracle Man.’ I feel you have provided me with a valuable set of new insights and tools that will surely help make my next draft a contender. ‘Cut me, Nick. Cut me.’ I’m looking forward to the challenge in front of me. If it’s okay, I’d like to keep you posted on my progress. Again, thanks.
These notes were fantastic! I’ve used some other services which were good, but these are on a whole other level. Thanks so much for the notes, I’ll definitely be using this service again…
Just wanted to thank you for the notes on ‘Clean Getaway.’ They were certainly helpful, almost eye opening in spots, and very encouraging. Hopefully this paired with Virtual Pitch Fest will lead to great opportunities. I’ll be sure to use your services again when I’m stuck on my next draft or script.
You were very generous with the edits and formatting! I really appreciate it! You are class act! And, of course, a wonderful writer! BIG thank you!
Wow David, thanks for reading everything and giving me so much fabulous feedback. I would much prefer to pursue the fiction realm with these stories (which is one reason why I invented Kate) so your suggestions are right up my alley. Your notes are incredibly helpful and specific, and so thorough! How validating and encouraging it is to learn that you think the project is worth pursuing! I want to keep going with this.
Thank you so much for your insightful notes on my screenplay. I can tell from your in depth coverage and reasonable rates that script coaching is not a job for you, it’s your soul work. You shine at this! I’m so grateful that I found someone with your skills. I can’t wait to get back to my screenplay and fix all the things you suggested. And yes, I will engage your services again to review the changes…
Would be remiss of me not to thank you for the comprehensive job you did on reviewing my screenplay. Never having dipped my toe in this particular stretch of water before; I was a little apprehensive in actually sending it off to you. The service you offer is first class in all aspects. I almost felt you put as much effort into creating it as I did! I will rework it along the lines you suggest and be back in contact for a re-review later in the year before taking it any further.
Thank you so much for the extremely insightful notes. You certainly gave me a lot to chew on and I agree with all of it. I can always count on you to zero in on the issues and deliver some good solutions. So far, your consults deliver the most bang for the buck over the competition…
Thanks so much for your notes on ‘Court Ordered Christmas’, I really appreciate it. Thanks for the encouragement, I really feel like there’s potential there, and your notes, especially about the conflict and stakes make a lot of sense. I’m going to get going on the next draft.
Thank you for your excellent and thorough coverage of ‘Rentboy’…I will definitely be using you again in the future…
Thanks for the outstanding analysis. I’m working on the next draft now. Script writing is completely new to me (well, writing of any kind), but your notes have really encouraged me.
That is a great review, synthesis and advice. I am persuaded by your suggestions.
We thank you so much for helping realize our query letter. We are very happy to come across you service and look forward to some promising results. Hope that you have a wonderful week.
John Dylan DeLaTorre
Thanks for the great notes. I found them to be helpful and to the point. It was great motivation for me to get started on the next re-write.
Thank you for the analysis of the re-write. As always, you are so correct in your analysis and I hope to start the changes this week.
Thanks so much for your thorough examination of my ‘Realty Crazy’ screenplay. I appreciate your detail and excellent suggestions…Thank you for your commitment to my professional growth!
I feel like your critique greatly improved my work.
I was on pins and needles, but you were worth every moment and every dollar spent. Thank you so much for your work. My partner and I are blessed to count you as a resource.
Many thanks for the terrific critique. Your feedback was actionable, right-on and constructive.
Wow. That’s all I can say. Terrific insight and advice.
Thank you so much for the advice and the outline. It’s going to help out tremendously.
I just wanted to say thank you very much for helping me with my edit. You don’t know how much I appreciate it. You are a very good man. You went above and beyond what you are supposed to do. You are talented and very well-spoken. This will also be an excellent guide for me writing other letters as well. If by chance there’s some big miracle and I do become successful, I will remember you. Until then, I’ll keep trying my best. Thanks again.
Thanks so much for your analysis and quick turn-around! Your comments and suggestions are excellent.
I just thought you might want to know that I got a positive response within six hours of submitting my first ten, and they asked for the script. Thanks for your coaching, samples and advice on the query letter. I have attached my final query letter in case you would like to see the end product. Again, thanks for taking the time to give me a tremendous amount of help in just a couple of emails.
Thank you so much. I’ve already read through the suggestions, and I’m starting to make some changes. I should have another draft ready soon, and as usual I will purchase your services again. Your suggestions are really helping craft ‘Insurgency’ into something that I love.
Thank you so much for the notes and suggestions. I’m already working on a re-write. All your advice is super helpful, and I look forward to continuing to do business with you.
Thanks David. Very helpful comments. Glad you enjoyed.
I wanted to e-mail you, because when I mailed you my scripts, you had a lot of criticism; but I needed to hear it…thanks to you being blunt with me, I believe I have managed to improve a lot. If I did not know how badly I needed to improve as a writer, then I might not have ever done so. After reading your criticisms, I read many more books on writing and forced myself to learn and write lots more to improve myself as a writer. I’m still young and learning, but I wanted to thank you for helping me so much in that regard…I never would have been able to improve on my writing for this story or all the other stories I have written in the past couple of years, if it was not for your advice…
Just wanted to say thanks. The notes are more thorough and helpful than expected! Will certainly come back to you/recommend your services.
Thanks for the analysis and query letter, David. I usually go to the Writers Store for help on early drafts, but thought I’d try something new this time. I’m glad I did. They are always very helpful, but your analysis is more in-depth without being longer. Your suggestions are spot-on and give me a nice road map on how to approach the second draft…
Thank you so much for your candid analysis! I’ll re-write the script based on your suggestions.
Great job. I really love your ideas and feel enthused about the re-writes and the potential. I am going to follow all of your suggestions and see where it takes things. It was great to have your experience and feedback. I know it isn’t there yet. However, I am committed to making this script great! Thanks again. I would love to keep you involved after the changes.
Thanks David! I can see where to work on my script now!
Outstanding. Thank you very much for all of your time and assistance on this. It’s been very educational.
Thank you, David. Your comments are very helpful. I’ve had friends reading it but they can be too close to the material. It helps to get a fresh, neutral eye. I appreciate your positive tone…
Thank you! Your input will help make my script stronger.
I just finished another re-write of ‘War Crossed Lovers’ which you have coached me on over the recent years. I used your query letter, and had a ‘YES’ in less than 10 minutes. The script is currently in a producer’s hands. Thanks you so much for just being so helpful.
Jenny Deason Copeland
Thanks so much for your thorough review of our script. Your comments are insightful and just what we were hoping to receive…
Thank you for the quality feedback. Very insightful information and I agree with your commentary 100%…Thanks again for the time and expertise.
Thank you very much for your insightful notes. They have smacked my screenplay up to a new and far more satisfying level.
Thank you for your assistance in preparing the query letter. You have been very helpful and I appreciate your efforts.
Thanks for your excellent critique of ‘Selling Seattle.’ I am very impressed with your work!
I’ve gone over the analysis a few times now and just wanted to thank you for providing me with some excellent perspective and suggestions once again.
It feels wonderful to finally have a query letter that I’m proud to send out! Thank you so much. Awesome service too! Again, many thanks.
Thank you for your insightful notes on my script, ‘Gradually Grace.’ The suggested changes were simple to execute but resulted in a much more powerful and entertaining storyline. I’ll be back for more of your terrific service with my next script…Absolutely phenomenal, detailed notes. I am deeply touched by your heart and mind…
Thanks for the coaching feedback on ‘Death Strikes Again.’ Your observations, comments and suggestions are very illuminating and give me a great blueprint to follow in my re-write…I’m very excited to be re-writing the script and to have those ‘ah, yes, this is right’ moments even from the few changes I’ve already made. Thanks again for your insightful analysis!
Thank you, David. I will incorporate all of your suggested changes/additions into my query letter. I really appreciate your assistance!
I just want to say how happy I am to have found both Script Coach and Virtual Pitch Fest. Film has always been my passion and I have extremely large goals I plan to accomplish in this field. Thank you for everything you do and for the opportunities you have created for writers.
Thank you for the analysis on the ‘Grand Alchemist.’ You’ve given me some great suggestions!
Thank you for your excellent notes! Once again, you have provided me with a platform to stand back and re-evaluate my work with a fresh perspective. As I’m sure you know well, it is hard as a writer to get this perspective on your own work. I am incredibly grateful to have you as a resource that allows me to get right back into rewriting without needing a sixth month break from the material to begin fresh.
…I will definitely be back for more of your script coach services. I haven’t found anyone else who is as good at this as you are. I have a couple of instructors/script coaches that are great, but I must say…you are the best!
Many thanks for your very useful notes. For being positive and for clearly highlighting the weaknesses. Warning: I’ll be back!
Thank you so much for the insightful and detailed notes, along with the quick turn-around in which you sent them. Wow, that was quick! Your critique was very helpful (and painless)…
I just had to take a moment to thank you and your staff for the feedback given on ‘Blazer Boy’…Those suggestions were awesome and have really given it new flavor. I’m not sure when the next draft will be ready because I’m taking it day by day. But when it is, hopefully this isn’t a onceshot deal because I’d like to come back again.
Thanks so much for your very constructive notes…I found your comments absolutely on target…
Wow! Thanks, David! That was fast…I, like most writers, hate trying to write a synopsis for something I’ve written and very much appreciate having someone else do it for me. So thanks for taking one headache away!
…I greatly appreciate your comments. I believe you were right on with the shortcomings and I believe I can make the script significantly better thanks to your input. Thanks very much for your help.
I found your appraisal to be very helpful, logical and comprehensive…Thanks again for spending the time to point me in the right direction
Thank you for the critique. Two observations. One, you really know this business. Two, you don’t charge enough for this service. I am in the process of making all of the suggested changes…All of the suggestions are dead-on.
What struck me the most about your presentation last Fall was your ‘bedside manner.’ A lot of presenters seemed to have the expertise, but you had that extra ‘I’ll treat your baby with TLC and your with respect’ manner–a nice touch in cold, hard Hollywood.
Thank you, your notes were a great help!
Your script coverage report was wonderful and I am working on incorporating all of your suggestions. Your comments made me feel far more confident in my writing skills.
Thanks so much for the prompt attention and for your thoughtful coverage. This will be extremely helpful for the next draft.
Thank you so much for your prompt response (as promised), and especially your most insightful comments. f you were a carpenter, I would say you hit the nail right on the head.
Your feedback was fantastic…
Thank you for your assistance. I appreciate all of your input, as well as the fast turnaround time. I have had time to digest the notes and feel ready to begin another draft with some of your great suggestions. Again I thank you very much and look forward to possibly working with you again.
Thanks for the very thoughtful notes! You raise several compelling points and I will be diving right into a rewrite to address them…
Wow, that was quick and superb. Thank you!
Thank you so much for your insightful comments! I really appreciate you help. I will read it more carefully over the next few days, let it sink in, and then, believe me, I will do the work! Thanks again so much.
Thank you very much for the wonderfully inspiring notes on my script ‘Trash,’ and for your kind comments…It really is a blessing to have a sounding board in the writer’s journey.
David, I can’t thank you enough for providing me both with the opportunity to hear your perspective on my story and for the notes you provided. They are invaluable… I feel I’m now armed with what I need for re-writes and pitching. Your service has in all ways been excellent. It makes submitting my script to a reader like going into a test already knowing the questions — and answers!
David Zuckerman grabs a’hold of a screenplay like a wolverine and won’t let go until it’s produced. That’s why it would be to your advantage to grab a’hold of David Zuckerman.
Billy Field("Caught in the Act")
…I just felt I had to write to you, and tell you thanks from the bottom of my heart for believing in me and my script. I really believe with your expertise, and my whole hearted feeling and determination, we can make this a real thing.
…I wish I had gone to you four months ago. I think you now understand why I couldn’t just use any L.A. script analyst for this screenplay.
Last night I read my original draft. Then I read what we have worked on. WOW! Even if this thing never sells, this has been the best investment to at least take my writing to a new level. I’m enjoying writing more than ever.
David…I will have to admit you have helped me more than words can describe and I thank you for that…
…I have used twelve Analysts in the past from ‘voted no.1 in the US’ too Script Pimp… and I have to say your approach is astounding and you know exactly what we want and where we hope to be from A-Z. I can say for sure that we will be working closely together until this script is on celluloid…finally an analyst who possesses manners and respect his mother would be proud of…
WOW! Great notes…Your story ideas, plot twists, character mods and overall tone ideas are inspirational to me…
Thank you for awesome, very clear and thoughtful notes… When the student is ready the teacher appears…and here you are.
Thank you for the tweak on my query. Right (write) on, man!…A couple less words in the logline and it’s golden. Thanks for liking it; your praise is like getting an ‘A’ from the professor…
David Kohner Zuckerman is like an expert mechanic. When the engine of my script is making a clunky noise that I can’t identify, he finds the problem and helps me fix it.